This week has been killing me and it's only Tuesday. I woke up this morning and nearly worked myself into a panic attack. I talked myself down though. I could feel my chest constricting.
All I want is one quiet night at home where I don't have anywhere to be. I can even have homework. I just want to sit down on a hot date with my new tea pot, a pretty smelling candle, and Ezra Pound.
Tomorrow I'm driving to the DMV around 7 in the morning. Then after classes I work for five hours. Which I shouldn't be complaining about--I really shouldn't because I do have off all weekend. But still, it's just hard to go to sleep when you know you have to wake up to that mess.
Thursday is another headache altogether. I have to be at the Intermediate school by 9 to observe a special education classroom, Bill's Moms, for 2 hours. Then I have classes---including hell class---followed by some special group project time in the library with those girls I can't remember the names of.
Maybe I wouldn't be so grumpy if I could eat, or laugh, or do anything that didn't hurt my mouth. It feels like someone punched me in the back of the mouth. Or, you know, injected me with three needles of novacaine and drilled at.
I just want a little time for myself, that's all. It was nice to sort of vent to Rachel in the car a little bit ago. She doesn't really say much back---which I like. Any sort of criticism or advice from friends always just seems demeaning. And what advice is there anyway? Flattening words.
I think the only thing getting me through the week is knowing that I'm going to the beach with Jen on Friday. And even though it's only two days away, I can't really see it. I feel like I have mountains of work to do.
And tonight I'm just achey and tired of being scattered in too many pieces.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment